by Joanne Ruffner...
        written on Apr 28, 2004

        Three years ago today at 10:30 am. I received a call in the morning from my dad. They had a possible match for my moms heart....As we raced down in different cars to the hospital (about an hour or so away) my mom made a list of things that would need to be done while she was in the hospital recovering... like water plants on certain days, pay bills, dust... things like that. She never thought she wouldn't make it... that was just her attitude all through her life.

        She flew through the operation that gave her the new heart... donated by an 18 year old boy who died in a car accident in California. Within 24 hours of the surgery she was sitting up in a chair. She felt no pain and was ready to get up and go! Before long she was wandering the halls with my dad and then off to an apartment close to the hospital so she could come back for physical therapy and check ups for the first 3 months.

        She ran into bumps but it never got her down. She didn't care about the bumps... it was what was past that bump that mattered most to her... what was past it was life, love, family and friends.

        Every year she drug her family to the Transplant Reunion that they held. To her it was important to go there and show her support for everyone and for the doctors. To see the faces of those people that had transplants and just how many there were was amazing. Last year it seemed to have grown so very much. We did not go to the one for this year.

        In 2002 my parents went back to Newfoundland where my mom was born and raised and where they met and were married. They had a family reunion with her family there and it was a wonderful time for my parents. They hadn't been home together since they left in 1959. My mom was in perfect health and she was ready to rock and roll. They even danced together....

        2003 something started to make her sick. She lost weight, had no energy and the doctors didn't know what was going on. Her heart was fine. Her body never rejected it. She was admitted to the hospital several times and on Dec 5, 2003 for the last time. She passed away with her family with her on December 21, 2003.

        Some would say that she was too young... she was only 61. But you know what? My mom would say that she was so lucky to have lived for so long. She received a Gift of Life from an Angel today...three years ago.

        I would give anything to have her back here with us today. I would give anything for just another day with her. I never knew that the card section in the stores would hurt as much as they do around this time of year.

        Sometimes I hear her voice... I hear her trying to tell me that it will be ok... that she is ok and that she loves me. It's hard to let it really sink in that she isn't here. That I can't go run and complain to her about how hard my day was or what sale was going on at the store.

        I miss her so very much and I know I always will... I also know that she enjoyed life so much. Though her time here with us was shortened she made the most of every single day in every way. She kept us kids in line with our lives and made sure we always knew she was there. Even now.

        I think of all the years that she had with us because of the donation of a lifetime... an organ. I had always talked about being an organ donor just never did it... now I carry one with me and have it on my license. That gift from a stranger kept my mom here with us two extra years. Though I wished it was more... I cannot complain because some people never had a mother to grow up with and to love the way I love my mom.

        My mom never complained about what life dealt her. She just went on. Nothing ever seem to get her down. She was a huge animal lover though never seem to fully get my love for ferrets LOL. Oh she thought they were the cutest thing and liked to tell people about the different animals I had. But she was always worried about stepping on them when she came over. So she would come in and sit down. Tonka would try to steal her shoes and she would just laugh and try to pet him. She had her favorites.... Spice (of course) and any of our sick ones. She had a knack for making any animal feel at home with her. The sick kids she took a special interest in. Maybe because her heart went out to them because she knew all too well about being sick.

        I am sorry for rambling on yet again. I really want to write a book about my mom. I have the title just nothing else. I don't know where to start or just what to write. I am hoping to go back to college in the fall... maybe then I will have the strength to write about her life and her love.

        So today... when you see your family or your friends... give them a hug. Tell them how much you care about them. Remember that everything and everyone are only here for a short time...

        Joanne Ruffner

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